The Finger

I know what you're thinking. The finger. Yup, that's a good finger, generally gets lots of use especially when I'm driving and someone cuts me off but not the one I'm talking about here. This time it's the pointer. The left hand pointer to be exact. Why this one? Why now? Well, I need my real one back. I'm pretty sure someone snuck in last month and replaced mine with someone else's. A guy's to be exact because I have some serious man pointer right now. The pain is pretty intense and it seems to be concentrated in just that finger. Something is just not right.

It all started about a month ago. I woke up about 4am with an intense pain in my finger. What the hell....I thought maybe I had a cramp. Who gets pain like that in a finger? I didn't think much of it. Until the next night. When it happened again. Only this time, it didn't go away. I thought I'm getting on in years, can it be? Sh*t, do I have arthritis now? I blew it off. For sure that's what it is. I just have arthritis in my pointer. By week 4, it seemed a bit strange that arthritis would wake me in the night with this intense pain. Damn, maybe I should stop cracking my knuckles. It was time to see the doc. I went for xrays. They came back normal. I'm currently waiting for my blood work so I don't know what the final results are. However, if it comes back normal I'm screwed. My finger is growing in size. I can't straighten it anymore & it hurts to move it. Plus finger has decided that I don't need much sleep and I'm tired. The pain is too intense that I can't sleep through the night.

Back to the real issue - who took my finger? How did they get in here? We have an alarm and a dog. Things like this just didn't happen in the Big Apple. Sure the weather is great in the Golden State but finger thieves? The least they could have done was made it a useful theft. What's a pointer good for? I can't flip a nice man-pointer at a motorist for cutting me off. Think of the effect that middle finger could have gotten me.